World could be out of bullets by 2020

(Colona Roundhouse News – April 10, 2015)

     Sources within the local Tri-Lateral Commission project the planet will run out of bullets by 2020. War as we now know it, says the secretive group, might be a thing of the past.
“Bullets have become a part of our very fiber,” said a member who demanded anonymity. I don’t want to be an alarmist but if something isn’t done to correct this oversight we could all find ourselves looking down the barrel of an empty chamber.”
War nets big profits for a small few and without little bullets the entire landscape expands and changes drastically.
“Can we expect angry combatants to go back to fighting with spears and arrows?” he asked, speaking now under the provision of unreliability. “What are they going to do…throw rocks at each other?”
Although no one knows exactly how this crisis emerged it is thought that someone earning minimum wage simply pushed the wrong assembly-line button or filled out an order sheet incorrectly.
“We do not believe this to be a terrorist action,” said the source.
“Man’s integrity will come forth when the time is ripe,” assured another member of the dictatorial commission. How do you think we developed the machine gun or the catapult?”
Ammunition enthusiasts are encouraged to learn new battle skills such as the digging of moats and the employment of hot oil on the parapets. Many smaller militias have already begun training recruits how to hurl pistols and rifles at opponents in hopes of hitting something.
“After all the violence and manipulation we never expected our realm to be threatened by the absence of bullets,” added the source. “I guess we just always thought they’d be there.” – Dag Katz