GOP Blocks Cigars for Chevys Deal

(Little Havana-Miami El Mundo – Santiago de Cuba Jan 20, 2015)
Denying the existence of illegal Cuban cigars in their desks, bars and cloakrooms, Republicans in the House have threatened to filibuster if the controversial Cigars for Chevys bill reaches their chambers.
The bill calls for a diplomatic exchange of Havana Cigars (illegal in the United States since about 1960) for the more than 200,000 1957 Chevrolets now on the road in Cuba.
The cigars were allegedly smuggled into the U.S. on a regular basis by Congressmen and other wealthy Americans until restrictions were eased this year. The problem is that there are more Cuban Cigars in the U.S. than in Cuba.
Due to an economic embargo imposed by Washington, newer U. S. cars have not been seen on Cuban streets since the late Fifties. Self-educated engineers have rebuilt the vintage Chevys and other cars now cruising the island roads. All are poor people who crafted combinations and recycled parts with a similar regularity.
The fact that U.S. politicians and businessmen have been shipping Havanas to China since Nixon’s historic visit in ___ has tweaked the math.
“We handed them out to the Chinese. Even though they could legally purchase the cigars they always enjoyed a good smoke,” said one Representative who demanded anonymity. “It’s always prudent keep an eye on interest accrued in light of imbalances in the trade deficit,” he smiled. “The cigars were just notions and most of them stale already. It was like giving some kid a balloon with a hold in it.”
“We have evidence somewhere that links the White House to a sinister plot to further manipulate the immigration crisis,” he purred. “He’s gonna let all those other Cuban Muslims come in and pay them to be here!”
– Pinto Mary