Deadheads’ Dogs Detained

(Red Rox — Canned Canine News — March 2016)

Several hundred arrested dogs, allegedly associated with Deadheads, have been released from three Denver Animal Control Units this morning. The animals were nabbed outside a recent Grateful Dead concert held her, near Morrison, Colorado.

According to a report security people called the dog cops when it became apparent none of the pooches were prepared to buy tickets and were about to storm the gates.

“Some skinny hippie by the name of Morrison paid their bail and we had no choice but to release them,” said a uniformed officer. “We’ll all be in court before summer.”

The dogs were released in downtown Denver, given a cheap suit and ten dollars and told stay out of trouble. They immediately headed west toward Red Rocks.

Attempts to positively identify the dogs’ benefactor have failed. No one in Morrison seems to know anyone named Morrison currently residing in Morrison.

– Attila Diggins