Peaky past and future forecast

One Hundred Years Ago: 1919

Marigold Compost wins a posthumous Whirlitzer for her cookbook Basil Recipes From the Abyss published just months before her son, Earl Compost, wandered off into the woods near Yellow Jacket in early 1920. Erotic Quechua-Hibernian pictographs found near the Tomb of the Eternal Inca. Veronica Haley born in Bay Ridge. Know Nothings presidential convention in Las Vegas cancelled after the majority of the delegates went to Reno by mistake. Prohibition heralds in the Gangster Era in counties wet and dry. Skeletal Whigs go under the hair dryer for the last time. White House liar’s bench erected on West Lawn. Former President William Howard Taft (weighing in at 350 pounds) pressures current President Woodrow Wilson to suspend habeas corpulence in honor of former President Grover Cleveland who weighed in at 300. Only 10 years after granting suffrage to women Wyoming accused of Mail Order Bride scandal. “The Briar Patch” opens to ravenous reviews on Broadway. Other popular plays include “A Fruitcake Named Desire”& “The Barber From Tashkent”

One Hundred Years Distant: 2119

Vodka nose first diagnosed in Greenland. Superstition, feudal states, and serfdom on the rise due to bad public health and education in the provinces. “Islands for the Poor” – a refuge for the misbegotten closed due to alleged money laundering on the beaches. Sleeper cells engage in bloodless revolution near Lower Insomnia. Bear Republic formally recognized by Cub Scouts. Many bruins flee restrictive fur laws. Subsidized honey blamed for market roller coaster. Colorado Marijuana Industry Finalizes Purchase of Wells Fargo, other banks. Last remnant of Syrian civilians relocated to Alabama. Agnostic missionaries feared lost in Uruguay.