Norwood Left Off World Map

(Wrights Mesa – Topo-Porno Maps Magazine – December 31, 2016)

Citizens are outraged here with the news that the own of Norwood has been left off the recently published Rand-McNally World Atlas.

“There will be hell to pay,” said one longtime resident.

While locales like New York, Chicago and Los Angeles were represented without issue by a large spot on the proceedings, Norwood was nowhere to be seen.

“We even got out the magnifying (spy) glass and reconnoitered the wide open spaces,” said Elf Manchuwski, a hardware/software entrepreneur headquartered up Thunder Basin. “And still we found no Norwood. This Rand McNally fellow is really playing with fire.”

Manchewski plans to circulate a petition in Norwood demanding a recall of “the defective atlases” and a written apology to the citizens of Norwood from Rand McNally. He would also like to get his picture in the Norwood Post.

Many here are particularly offended by the snafu in that McNally is likely related to the McNallys in Naturita, known Norwood haters and probably poachers.

“The pizza deliver guy smelled like patchouli oil and cheap gin. I hated him right away, hated him for everything I had no experienced out there on the road…but that has absolutely nothing to do with the story I am about to share with you tonight.”

-Rocky Flats