Man Not Baker But Ross

(Continued from page 445)

many long tedious years later. To his friends Bonzo Stiltze had always thought he was Josephine Baker, even from the beginning he accepted, and some say reveled, in the fact that he was the sultry Black American dancer who had taken Paris by storm in the 30s. Films of the snaky moves and seductive trances common to Baker scattered his shabby flat. Song and dance routines were second nature to Stilze.

“It was fun to be Josephine,” said Stiltze, an undertaker by trade who lives with his mother in someone’s suburbs.

Then one day he woke up and realized that he was not Josephine Baker at all but rather Dianna Ross.

“After all these years it’s quite a relief to know the truth no matter how painful,” said Stilze in a television interview. “I’ve always liked Detroit and I can’t wait to meet the other Supremes.”

– Quartney Pettifogger