My Latino Wall Stories

I remember once when my daughter and I traveled to Mexico to visit some friends who had moved there from Colorado. As we passed the border we both let out an individual sigh of release then looked at each other laughing at the simultaneous relief. We were no longer in Babylon.

Sure Mexico was no paradise. One had to keep an eye out. There was chaos on the border but not inside the heads of the residents like in the other America. We drove to the Immigration Office to show our papers. The local kids were fascinated with my German Shepherd who had gleefully enjoyed the ride from the Rockies from her optional shelter in the back of my pickup.

The kids were afraid at first but then when she started licking them they squealed in joy. They were ecstatic at the presence of this fury visitor. I let them feed her and give her water. They were in heaven and so was she with all these little kids around. Sweet girl.

Meghan went in first and I stayed behind the watch things around the truck. It would make a few minutes to get her passport stamped. It was taking longer than it should and I shot a few glances at the tin office while I played with the kids.

“Come se llama? I said. Que bueno! Me gusta su nombre.”

When my daughter returned she was laughing and looking back at the office. She was obviously pleased but blushing ever-so-slightly. She greeted the kids.

One of he immigration men had told his compadres that she was his next wife. Thinking she was a blonde-haired, blue-eyed gringa and didn’t speak the language he had gone on and one to the delight of his friends. The she dropped the hammer.

“Tiene una casa, señor? Donde nos viviremos después? No necesito mucho pero yo quiero muchas ropas y un caro simpatico.” (Do you have a house? Where will we live? I don’t need much just a lot of clothes and a nice car)

It blew his shorts off. His friends were stunned and then exploded into laughter. Like all civil servants the world over they deal with boredom. They were well entertained.

When it came my turn to go to immigration I walked in and identified the prime suspect saying “Hijo!” and attempted to embrace my new son-in-law much to his dismay. It brought the place down. Meghan said she could hear the laughter from the parking lot. They got so carried away I had to twice remind them to stamp my passport.