Reader Survey Results

(Continued from page 5)

and some 45% of them suggested we move the entire operation over to Utah.

On the subject of electoral projections a majority of respondents said that rather than scan the small print they’d just as soon wait until the movie came out.

Of the 145,000 responses 9500 were written on the back of butcher’s paper and 15,000 were scribbled over discarded grocery lists which leads our editorial board to surmise that our readers are eating well. When asked what paper they preferred to procure in normal a fish and chips exchange the Horseshoe Was a distant third to the Grit and the Sunday Denver Post.

A striking response has emerged from the pet category wherein over 90% of our respondents say they have a new puppy in the house. A paltry 8% had exotic birds and 6 were house painters who didn’t like animals. A conclusive number of those surveyed insisted that their IQs were far above average and that family trees stretched all the way back to the Mayflower (the moving company no doubt).
In the social circle a surprising 78% said they favored more photos of hangings and fewer pictures depicting senior citizen nudity than before.

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