TRUMP TARGET OF BROOKLYN VENDETTA

Donald Trump reportedly stiffed a waiter at Sheep by Barashka in Brooklyn back in 2015 and it has not been forgotten. Not even close. As if this sitting president didn’t have enough to worry about these days he is being trailed, taunted, shadowed and harassed by several Russian syndicates that call Coney Island and Sheep’s Head Bay their home turf.

Locals here say that if they catch up with him it may not be a pretty scene.

Stopping short of calling their actions a vendetta, three waiters and a chef (Trump insulted the food too) have ben methodically planning to get even for years. It is common knowledge that honor takes the front seat and Trump was tied up in the trunk, according to a Russian proverb.

Eyewitnesses , many of whom have disappeared, (mostly older people with heavy Russian names) contend that Trump acted belligerently and tried to leave the restaurant without paying his bill. One of the waiters then chased him but was held back by body guards. It was not clear if the bill was covered.

“If he paid the bill he never tipped,” said one of the staff who still works at the eatery. “What an insult! We don’t forget this kind of behavior and have been biding our time. Our borscht is the best in New York and our golubtsy is to die for.”

Sheep by Barashka (little Barbara) long ago denied that there was a score to settle preferring, at least in public, to put them matter to rest. Sadly, many veterans on the staff still bristle when someone with orange hair walks in the front door..

“He hasn’t been back,” said the chef. “We remain on watch for him or any of his minions who will be escorted promptly out. With all the wonderful customers we have enjoyed over the years it is a shame to see one bad apple throwing around his increased weight.”

It was not known if this recent action would complicate a rumored application via the White House for a request for political asylum in Russia. It was not clear if the desired petition traveled through prescribed diplomatic channels or if it named names. Vladimir Putin, president of Russia did not return our phone calls seeking information on recent diplomatic functions or new sanctions yet to be levied by the Senate.

-Alfalfa Romero