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Largest pancake continues to expand

Big Al Carpe’s Annual Food Fair over at the Federal Gov’ment began last weekend but the winning pancake batter did not adhere to closing times. As of this morning the winning pancake continues to grow, seeping and amassing, It is now more than a mile in circumference and growing.

More than 2,000 acres have already been smothered by the batter blob which takes trees and topsoil, redefining canyons and gulches along the way along its robotic trek to the sea.

“This is big” said a BLM spokesperson. But we think it’s killing some pine beetles.”

Molten lava-like surges continue to threaten the snotty beach suburbs near Sync Hole and creep steadily into the Ski Trenches toward the volatile Sun-dried Tomato Parkway, slowing Pinkyville commuters to their television sets and light beer.

Eyewitnesses report that the blob is less than five miles from the Security Fences at Badrap and only yelling distance from Haley Draw and the promiscuous oilfields of the Eurasian Abyss.

Fire departments from Cahone to Maybelle are standing by and talking heads over in Denver are sending in more butter and syrup to placate the pancake and ward off what is beginning to look like another seasonal disaster. Leaders here are fearful that the batter will duplicate itself if it reaches the dairy farms of Entrailia or the densely populated slums of the Lust River Valley.

The winner of the contest, who was not named pending notification of his creditors, would not comment on the development nor share his recipe. No charges were filed.

– Pockets Marsupial