All Entries Tagged With: "Dump sources fear the worst in campaign trash"

Campaign Litter Taxing Landfills

(Montrose) Mounds of discarded campaign litter have journeyed to local landfills causing a nightmare for workers there. The litter, comprised of signs, banners, buttons and bumper stickers started arriving the day after the national election and, according to dump sources, has not let up at press time.

“We even discovered human hair and what appear to be finger nails apparently pulled and nibbled during what was an incredibly close election for President on November 5,” said one sanitation associate.

     At first it looked like the normal election year assault but this year it shows no indication of letting up. Tonnage is way up although estimates of actual gross weight delivery are difficult to determine since the new trash mixes quickly with existing, non-partisan trash.

     One particularly offensive pickup load, mounds of campaign literature covered in fresh manure, green chili skins and rotting pumpkins fertilized some imaginations here.

     “We didn’t know if it were just a coincidence that the elements were traveling together or if someone was trying to make yet another political statement,” laughed one worker.

     Landfill crews hope to get the situation under control here before the onslaught of Christmas garbage reaches their gates in late December.

– Rory Lyons