Feds apologize for illegal raid

(Tuba City, AZ) Treasury agents say they’re “awfully sorry” about a mindless raid on the Knights of Columbus Bingo Pavilion here. After arresting several hundred bingo enthusiasts, the intruders finally determined that no laws had been broken, released all prisoners and vacated the premises.
“What if something illegal had been going on?” spouted Special Agent Wanda Wanna. “One can never be sure with wide open gambling running amuck.”
The feds had apparently mistaken Tuba City for Mesquite, Nevada from the air. According to the architects of the assault Mesquite had been the original target since it is located closer to a four-lane highway.
“I had one little combination to go and I would have won over fifteen bucks,” said Evelyn “Grandma” Sumpump, of nearby Cow Springs. “I plan to sue the government for that figure plus another two or three dollars for emotional duress.”
The feds plan a surprise raid on Mesquite and the sin city of Bunkerville next Friday, unless it rains. -Mel Toole