Horseshoe in Canada

(Halifax) General Kashmir Horseshoe has reportedly joined the Peace Corps according to a report filed here Thursday. Close aides say the 147-year-old publisher “seeks to build up a little credit in the eternal lottery before he’s too old to get around anymore”. Horseshoe’s first assignment is here in Nova Scotia where he will teach Third World hockey fans how to sell newspaper advertising.

“It is the salvation of capitalism at the grassroots level,” said Melvin Tool, a long-time whipping boy who will make the trek to Canada with Horseshoe.

If the impromptu team is successful in the said endeavor they will then secure porters at Pugwash and journey inland through New Brunswick to the St. Lawrence waterway. Upon their arrival there they will begin a search for mythical caches of Canadian beer thought to be hidden from explorer, Pierre Gaultier “Mickey” de Varennes by Acadian folk hero Francois Labatts in 1707.

By then it will again be time for football season.