Colorado Leads in Loafers

(Denver) Maybe it’s the great weather or the outside lifestyle. Whatever it is Colorado leads the nation in per capita loafers. Idle rich, inheritance dunces, ski bums, trustafarians, camp squatters, entitlement bangers, second home owners, shiftless hawkers, realtors, journalists, and worthless hippies make up some 68% of the Rocky Mountain State. Shocking though it may seem many here look to the tourist influx for guidance and embrace of the work ethic.
“Colorado may be the thinnest state but we are plagued with transient vagabonds and assorted riff-raft from every socio-economic sector,” said Dr. Sluggard of Pea Green Academy, recipient of a monster grant to study human behavior in whistle stops without train service throughout the West.
“Our preliminary findings concur with the national statistics,” gasped Sluggard. “We have tipped the apple cart and are on the way down the path to devastation. Our leaders must act today and pass serious immigration and right to work reform before the entire place ends up like the Caribbean nations where a
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