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Black will not replace Biden for next debate say Ranking Dems

Is Warshington Burning?

Suggestions that Colorado Rockies’ manager Bud Black replace President Joe Biden in the second Presidential Debate were vehemently shouted down by the radical cashew and pecan gallery here.

Rumors gaining steam in the House openly predicted that Black, who claims no political affiliation, would stand-in for the president on September 10. Citing what they called a befuddled disconnect during the last debate, many say GOP challenger Donald Trump relied on madcap lies, raging misrepresentation and brutish fearmongering , to plow through the less than enchanting evening, His unhinged approach seemed to impress many voters compared to general disappointment voiced by the Biden people.

Frighteningly enough it appears the switch was percolated by the fact that the two men look alike and little more. Biden never played top tier baseball and Black’s political aspirations hit a wall in a student council election in high school. Black is much younger, at 66, than either of the frontrunners, and, according to attending physicians, much healthier.*

Black’s career winning percentage is below .500 while Biden’s approval rating hovers and hobbles at around 43%. Neither are known felons.

Yes the dozing electorate may still be asleep. Most expressed deep-seated frustration with the choices of the two leading political parties…two old white men. One is over-the-hill and gazing upwards, while the other believes he is on the top of the same hill, looking down. One not quite saying enough and the other never shutting up.

Meanwhile GOP stalwarts are praising the Lord, stampeding sheep and moving ahead with gerrymandering. The culmination of which is the exhuming of former Commander-in-Chief, Dwight Eisenhower to replace Trump on stage if the latter cannot get work release from prison. Eisenhower is seen by many as the last honest Republican (Jimmy Carter the last Democrat in this capacity) and could work well in today’s jumbled and angry political arena.

Neither Biden, Black or Eisenhower returned our phone messages Thursday.

*Black has never spent a weekend in Dover and does not eat fast food.