Rove “interested” in Pontiff Position

(Roma) Super PAC inspiration, Karl Rove, has expressed guarded interest in a Papal opening

created by the announced resignation of Pope Benedict XVI today. Rove, the architect of beguiling and delusional Presidential campaigns in the U.S. is acknowledged as the premier propagandist and master of  deceit.

The Pope’s decision to step down, the first of his stripe to do so in six centuries, came as a shock to the Roman Catholic hierarchy, which already embroiled in Lent and under the gun in sex abuse cases all over the globe. The Tweeter Pope, as Benedict has come to be known, was also having trouble adding and subtracting in Roman numerals.

“The Holy Father could not even tell you what Super Bowl he was watching and he bet on the 49ers,” said one up-and-coming Cardinal, his eyes on the Cat-Bird Seat in the Popemobile.

The Pontiff who says he wants to “retire while I’m still kickin” will drain the Vatican coffers and redistribute the estimated billions to the impoverished of Latin America.

“Like hell he will,” said the red-robed cleric.

Whether or not the potentially empty coffers will affect the evil genius Rove’s pursuits is anyone’s guess. One controversial Venetian bishop suggested that the Pope was “well within his rights” to give away the money, accumulated since the Dark Ages.

“We’ve finally gotten around to doing what Jesus told us to do 2000 years ago,” he smiled.

– Kashmir Horseshoe

“Monkey wrench the Mother Frackers!”