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Pope explains “Rising” to herd of goats in Sicily

“So this Jewish guy ascended into heaven? Who pushed the rock out of the way? How did he get airborne?” asked the leading goat, his horns shined and his speculative goatee in full contemplation.

It was like this,” explained the Pope… “the unfortunate fellow died and they buried him in a secret cave, then the next morning somebody pushes the massive rock out of the cave entrance and he shows up again showing off wounds and then going up into the sky. A pleasant enough maiden named Mary would perform the same trick upon her death some time later. The Hundus and the have similar stories and paintings of hallowed people ascending into god knows where.

“Oh.” said the goats, agreeing that it was a nice story.

The Pope left Palermo tonight by jet boat for Morocco where he will convalesce from a relentless bout with a rare infallibility virus. He is expected to recover.

-Fred Zeppelin

“I’m only too happy to play God.” – Lucifer