All Entries Tagged With: "news coverage"
Breaking News Like Breaking Wind says Veteran Scribe
(Fincaville) Gracie Bellborne who is said to have “intimately covered” the Wall Street Crash, The Dust Bowl, The Rise of Roosevelt, the Battle for Singapore, Benito Mussolini’s wedding and the Partition of India says it was all quit enjoyable.
Having spent the past 50 years chain smoking, drinking vast quantities of homemade gin and spewing pomposities Bellhorne had hoped to “visit Mars or at least Jupiter” before she passed.
“She spends every evening getting pissed, looking down her silver cigarette holder, castigating anyone who disagrees with her juvenile appraisals,” said one longtime confidant.
The 112-year old organic gymnast was whisked into town yesterday to dedicate a statue to former hurling great Conor McSpam, whom she has never met but once saw play in Kilkenny while barnstorming the Republic of Ireland in 1965.
“I have no idea who he is,” said Bellborne, “but I love to ride on the bus.”
“YOU DON’T LOSE IF YOU GET KNOCKED DOWN. YOU LOSE WHEN YOU STAY DOWN. “ MOHAMMED ALI