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(Crested Butte) The much maligned Karma Man will once again be coming around and going around in these mountains for the summer. Despite attempts by some residents to convince him to circulate a wider radius, he will be in local faces through September. Civic and religious leaders have struggled to determine the source of his incredible powers but have failed, leading the scientific community to project that his activities are in sync with the cosmic flow.

“He was here last summer and people immediately started reaping what they had sowed,” said one local sage. “It’s a really beautiful sight to behold unless of course you are one of the people who have been taking extended draws against the bank of morality.

“This Karma Man character doesn’t have to do much,” he continued. “We do it all to ourselves. He is just the avenue of delivery, the medium of exchange on the stock market of destiny.”

Although nothing is etched in stone, the Karma guy’s tentative schedule is as follows:

Crested Butte: July 10 -20; Gunnison: July 21 -Aug 9; Montrose: Aug 10 – 22 Ridgway: Aug 23 – Aug 30) Ouray: August 23-August 30; Norwood: September 1-6; Telluride: September 7-21.

 Any inmates of the smaller towns in the region should report to the closest burg as defined above. 

“Kiss my aura, Dora.”  – Frank Zappa (1940 – 1993)