All Entries Tagged With: "South Texas counties"

GOP Gerrymanders Counties Back To Mexico

(Brownsville UPS) Unsettling rumors that abortive, paper Christian Texas lawmakershave returned at least 5 Texas counties to Mexico were confirmed this afternoon. 

The accidental shift, an attempt to prevent people of color from embracing the power of the vote, was called “our mistake” by an embarrassed, yet continually ignorant class of politicians not seen since the Third Reich.

The counties shipped back to Mexico include Jim Wells,  Dimmit, Willacy,  Patricio, and western parts of Arnsas and Kleberg. All have had high Latino populations since the 1700s.

“We are certain that something can be worked out to alleviate this mishap,” said spokesman Rory Alamo, a non-elected official with impressive sway in the House. If not we’ll have to invade again. Remember Vera Cruz!”

The affected counties will have until January to legally respond to the changes. Residents there will most likely vote in a special election to determine future nationality. Will they stay in the US or join Mexico? 

Nobody knows.

– Red Greene  

“Fortune favors the already rich. If the peasants rises the wealthy will simply hire the Moors.” 

– Roscoe “Chepe” Mola