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NBA to adopt power play
(Denver) In an attempt to beef up sagging weeknight attendance over the tenuously long season, the National Basketball Association has adopted a slew of National Hockey League regulations. Included in next season’s amendments to the NBA Rule Book include the use of a penalty box, an expanded power play, and icing.
Soon, for the first time in the league’s history, fans will witness the employment of a penalty box for players called for personal fouls and unsportsmanlike behavior. The detainment boxes will be located under each basket, in full view of the crowd, where infractions will be punished for varying lengths of time according to the seriousness of the offense. Players deemed guilty such no-nos as throwing elbows, biting and tripping will do time here while traditional hoop violations such as charging, eye poking and traveling will go unpunished.
“First and foremost we don’t want to give up expensive seating space along the floor for penalty boxes,” said one NBA official. “These seats constitute a premium experience and we don’t want to rock the boat here in return for punitive considerations. Whether or not players who foul out will have to spend the rest of the game in these boxes has not been determined.”
“We don’t want the whole thing to turn into some sort of circus,” said the official. “Besides, we need to protect our millionaire athletes from aggressive, sometimes violent fans, swept up in the fast break moment.”
The power play will create a brand new set of consequences as four-on-five or even a three-on-five situations evolve on the court. Fears that the move will result in half-court affairs which could slow transitional play were shoved aside in light of potentially high scoring contests. Streamlined by a fast break mentality, the round ball power play is aimed at creating a scoring thret beyond the 3-point shot.
“We could very well see the return to legal zone defenses and whistles for petty violations,” said the source. “The potential for one-sided scoring opportunities might make a player think twice before shoving competitors or reaching in.”
Intentional icing, where a player throws the ball across the half-court for obvious defensive purposes, will result in further restrictions on play. In the early parts of the match it will be dealt with as only a loss of possession while in over-time it will constitute a jump ball (face-off) at the foul-line of the opposing team. This breach of the game’s new precepts could have dire consequences as any ardent fan would soon realize.
Fundamental elements of both games will be included in the rule book as the season progresses, however conflicts resulting from hazy prosecution of goal tending and crease infractions will be up to the discretion of the official on the floor. In addition the custom of wearing helmets and pads will be scrutinized by the league based on the level of violence and the general flow of play.
“Protective equipment could easily become cumbersome during a fast break,” said the official, “but we have to protect our players from serious injury. The floor is hard but so was the ice and at least we’re not stupid enough to cover the playing surface with astroturf.”
-Rocky Flats
