All Entries Tagged With: "metaphysical fears"

SPIRIT ABUSE BILL PICKS UP STEAM IN HOUSE

A shaky proposition sponsored by secular congressmen seeks to terminate the rampant exploitation of metaphysical fears and unexplained phenomenon forwarded by “unclean, soulless predators preying on the human predicament since before fabricated gods were cooked up in  Mesopotamia, Switzerland or Boston.”

One popular creed, Fiscal Puritan, disguised as a ragged holy man screaming platitudes from the desert, where transparent spirits abound, claims to have the ear of the All-Knowing.

A popular strip mall preacher has gone so far as to suggest that book banning is akin to, and often as effective as, witch burning and lynchings. “Communists!”, he shouted peering into the opaque ceiling and beyond. He used this word 37 times in a 2-minute rant, even as his well buffed knuckles exposed the strain of regular contact with the pavement.

“They have successfully tapped the anger cask, the hate keg,” said a competing transcendent mystic from across the path of corpulence. “Charlatans in our own barnyard bringing in the sheep? That won’t do,” he gasped.

“The self-divined often resent losing half of their flock to the new guy on the block,” ripped the book igniter. “He should have spiced up the oatmeal he serves on Sundays.”

The spirit abuse bill, which would require that mail order preachers and the self-proclaimed righteous would have to show a clean soul and honorable intentions before sinking their teeth into the soft underbelly of the fearful flocks.

A prominent church-and-state separatist called for religious to pay taxes if they continue to toy with and wallow in the ongoing political fray.

“Cornucopias, Mumbo-Jumbo and prosperity… There’s big money to be made in religion,” he quacked.

Another fence-sitter suggested sending in legions of archangels to punish these charlatans.

“They spend their lives worrying about the afterlife without having considered that this world may well be it. It’s no wonder with these lies and convoluted explanations that we see so many unhappy people wandering around not knowing how to enjoy this beautiful garden,” she clucked.

See related references to metaphysical fraud, “faith fraud”, divinity detachment,

and fear-based pablum, olfactory soul abuse

“Gosh there sure have been a lot of Palestinians killed in Gaza. Somebody should do something.” – Anthony Blinken, US Secretary of State.