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Local Airport Gears Up For Halloween

Rather than, as a precautionary measure, ban costumes from departures and arrivals on Halloween Day, the Cookie Tree Airstrip has announced it will beef up security in and around the facility.

     “This will consist of bringing in about 50 head of cattle and bovine accessories,” said Fred Zeppelin, Director of Homing Pigeon Safety for the military gov’ment. “We figure with all those Herefords hanging around the X-ray machine nobody’s gonna sneak through our radar.”

     Airflow officials expect traffic to be heavy and disguises to be common on Halloween, a holiday stolen from the pagans and turned into All Saints Eve by early Christians in 54 AD.

     “It’s hard enough landing a 747 in mined skunk cabbage fields without having a bunch of loonies running around dressed like witches or Frankenstein,” said Zeppelin. “What if someone dresses up like an Arab? Some might even try to dress up like us. This could get ugly.”

– Jack Spratt