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’98 class reunion canceled

(Gunnison) A reunion of the class of 1898 has been canceled since all potential participants are no longer among the living. After repeated attempts to contact persons believed to have attended Gunnison High School during that period the organizers have given up.

“All we had to go on was a tattered list and a few songs and myths that have survived over the decades,” said one exhausted volunteer. “Although they had a written language and a slew of newspapers back in those days the information we sought was remote at best.”

Persons who might have graduated in 1898 would most likely have been born around 1880 which would make them 140 years old today.

“We found a few people in their early 100s but nobody any older,” said the same source. “It was a good idea in concept but in reality it fell quite short of the goal.”

The group has now focused on creating a class reunion for persons attending Gunnison High School from 1940-1970.

“We’ve found lots of these people still kicking around and have talked to many about attending our function,” said the volunteer. “The 1898 reunion would have been rather slow anyway. Sure, people are living longer these days but we were pushing the issue.”

“Still as the moon at Sligo or mad as monkeys in Bahia, satire is a delicate blend of knowledge accrued mixed with whatever you can create from thin air.”   

– Uncle Pahgre, in Writing Stupid.