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Yeti snapped in Almont Triangle

Yeti snapped in Almont Triangle

Second appearance in as many months

(Jack’s Chalet) Two local men say they have documented what is believed to be yet another yeti sighting south of here. Only this time the creature was captured on film.

In addition to a color photo the two, Melvin O’Toole of Cahone and Earl MacAdoo of Baldwin, claim they saw giant footprints, heard low growls and found bits of course hair stuck to aspen trees.

“It appears that this fellow was in a big hurry to go somewhere,” said O’Toole, a surveyor who was mapping the area for a massive condo development. “The foot prints were different than anything a bear could leave behind. For about an hour both Earl and I felt we were being watched, then we saw the creature break from his wooded redoubt and sprint across an adjacent snowfield.”

O’Toole says the yeti covered about 10 yards in no time at all. He believes the creature had been startled by their chainsaw or was simply late for an appointment in Gunnison.

The yeti, dba Bigfoot, aka The Abominable Snowman was thought to reside exclusively in the Himalayan Range near Mount Everest. Called metoh kangmi by Tibetan villagers the name yeti was given to it by Sherpa tribesmen in Nepal. The word most likely meant all-devouring creature. According to legend he is a hairy beast, with a large ape-like body and a face that resembles that of a cow. 

“That’s the guy,” said MacAdoo. Throw in a long neck and some big ears and you got him pegged.”

Neither man could verify that the monster’s arms reached the ground and didn’t think that it was actually walking erect.

“It was getting dark and our vision was limited,” said O’Toole. “He moved quite gracefully but still in silhouette form and lingering in the brush.”

Both men said they feared an attack due to the close proximity of the encounter. They add that the yeti never looked in their direction lending credence to a theory that he never saw them at all. 

“He could sure use a shower,” laughed O’Toole when the county’s 300 police officers showed up to investigate. County officers quickly sealed off the area while Gunnison city cops ran their sirens as a probing, territorial gesture.

The governors of Colorado, Utah, Wyoming, Kansas and New Mexico  are expected to visit the site Monday unless it rains.

Despite the inherent dangers of a missing link running around the woods, the mood is light here due to the arrival of spring. Already Alpine Express drivers have begun stopping in the hope that their charges might view more than eagles along the East River. Excursions into the back country have almost tripled since the sighting.

“It’s all very exiting,” said one Division of Wildlife officer. “It will be interesting to see the outcome and how it might affect our secret plans to reintroduce the Grizzly, the three-toed sloth and the Eurasian wild boar to Western Colorado.

Yetti captured on film in Gunnison County

Other reaction was mixed as sheep herders fear losses, realtors worry about the price of an acre, and biologists scurry around attempting to make sense out of the phenomenon.

Cynics question how the beast might have remained undetected for so long. Although dietary needs could easily be met there is little else for the yeti to do around here on cold winter nights. Even the movie theaters have shut down. They suggest that the footprints were merely enlarged due to exposure to the winter sun which they say melted them into wider forms. They add that the yeti would be more likely to hang out near the more posh resort areas of Aspen and Vail than near funky Crested Butte.

One benefit of the entire incident may be that while tromping about the Almont Triangle authorities have determined that the area is not a triangle at all but a hexagon. How this discovery will affect plans to build a green belt parking lot along Hypotenuse Creek is unclear at press time.

Due to this second coming, the two campers who claim to have seen the yeti last month are enjoying their day in the sun. According to one of them nobody believed us, not even our moms. Most said the creature was a bear, others insisted it was a second home owner from Taylor Canyon or a lost snowboarder.

– Estelle Marmotbreath