PADRIAC AND THE DEVIL

In the days before modern court reporting, an elderly lawyer of County Kildare had a young servant named Padriac, who was endowed with a phenomenal memory. The old lawyer had good reason to be proud of Padriac’s amazing talent. His servant was able to sit in court and, at any point in the process of a trial, he could reel off every word of testimony that had transpired before. Padriac’s reputation was so great that his evidence “on the record” was accepted in any court in the county.

One day, the lawyer was in his study, contentedly smoking his dhudeen, when the Devil appeared.

“What do you want?” demanded the lawyer.

“I have come for Padriac,” was the answer.

“Ah, so it’s Padriac you’d be taking’, is it?” Well my fine Dhioul, I can’t spare him, so be off with you!”

“It can’t be helped achora,” said the Devil impertinently. “His time is up. And he’s losing his memory.”

“Come now, you’re a sportin’ man,” argued the lawyer. “I’ll make a little bet with you. If Padriac’s memory is failing, he’s no good to me and you can take him. Test the man, and if you can fool him, he’s yours. But if you can’t he stays.”

“Agreed,” said the Devil with a smirk and disappeared.

Padriac was in the field digging knassters, when suddenly the Devil appeared before him.

“Do you like eggs?” asked the Devil.

“Yes,” answered Padriac, and the Devil disappeared in a puff of smoke.

The following years, from 1840 to 1851, were hectic ones in Ireland. The potato famine caused untold misery. Then the old lawyer died and Padriac was thrown out on his own. After that came a renewal of “the troubles” with England and Padriac fought the British up and down the east and west coasts of his homeland. He survived many years of hunger, of wandering and fighting with little more than a few wounds. Finally, now silver-haired and bent, he settled down on his own piece of land.

One day while Padriac was cultivating a little lot, the Devil appeared to him.

“How?” asked the Devil.

“Fried”, said Padriac.

– Patrick Ireland