Old Fart Accepted by Webster’s

(Linguistics of London — October 23, 2015)

The term Old Fart will be included in the Merriam-Webster Dictionary and Thesaurus for 2016 according to wordsmiths and language gurus here. The label, which is sometimes considered derogatory, denotes age and, in some cases, attitude. It has nothing to do with aroma or personal hygiene.

“We have added Old Fart to our roster due to colloquial considerations, repeated use within the population, and familiarity,” said Wanda English, a standup editor with the prestigious dictionary concern. “Like it or not, Old Fart has forced its way into our idiomatic legions and is poised to take its rightful place between Old English and old fashioned.”

Although probably incorrect in a political sense, the dimensions of the grammatical reference include abbreviations, synonyms, relevant usage and even Morse code tables.

“Nobody is saying the idiom exemplifies proper or even acceptable language but we are including Old Fart because it is a valid expression in the 21st Century,” said English,

“Virtually everyone knows what it means. Grace and precision are the main considerations in determining our wordy roster and common use dictates the parameters and accessibilities offered to persons of intelligence.”

English was quick to point out that the use of this term in face–to-face encounters in no way offers protection from canes, false teeth bites or other handy weaponry long associated with the elderly.
– Kashmir Horseshoe