Feds Threaten Meat Supply in Pot Beef

(Leadville, CO High Country Smoke Rings November 5, 2015)

Controlled personalities at the federal level have threatened to cut off Colorado’s meat sources if that state doesn’t tow the line on U.S. marijuana laws. Colorado, along with Oregon and Washington has decriminalized the use of pot in small amounts for recreational use.

“The feds don’t like to be outflanked,” said a pro-pot source here. They like to dictate to us, to be in charge. Our lickety-split, wham bam amendment to the state constitution nailed them to a tree.”

Instead of embracing progressive stands on social issues, neighboring states have petitioned the federal government for help enforcing archaic pot laws in their states. The frustrated response has been nothing more than a series of ultimatums but now it looks like some probing action is in the wings.

“They may be serious about his meat thing,” said the source, “but Colorado is self-sufficient. We have the water, the timber, the sun, the wildlife, the lifestyle and yes, plenty of meat. We also tolerate others, even vegetarians! Out neighboring states are just jealous.”

Applications for hunting licenses have jumped 46% since the federal meat threat was made public. Sales of firearms and gear have been off the charts indicating that a massive in-state hunting population will take to the woods in October.

If Colorado decides to heal and follow the precepts of the central government the meat wagons will once again cross the prairie. If not it could be grilled cheese and tomato soup for the winter.

“It’s the old classic state’s rights question here,” said the pro-marijuana spokesman. “We went to war on this issue once and may have to do so again. Either way I’ve been taking a lot of target practice.”

How this recent bullying might affect the pot status in Washington and Oregon was not undressed. Several other states are expected to include propositions and amendments on the question of recreational marijuana use on their November ballots. Many already have medical marijuana programs in force.

Tentative legislation is impending in six other states that have been impressed with Colorado’s experimental successes.
– Gabby Haze