Czar and Family Murdered

The Russian Imperial Romanov family (Nicholas II of Russia, his wife Alexandra Feodorovna, and their five children: Olga, Tatiana, Maria, Anastasia, and Alexei) were shot and bayoneted to death by Bolshevik revolutionaries under Yakov Yurovsky on the orders of the Ural Regional Soviet in Yekaterinburg. That cloudless July night in 1918 could have just as easily been last night in the Kremlin.

Shocked and brainwashed Russians expressed concern that precedents like this could dictate an end to the current administration in Moscow as soon as this week. Vladimir Putin, the ex- KGB strongman, remained in seclusion, fighting his war in Ukraine from “the other end of the table”. Inside sources ay he has requested asylum in North Korea should the current tide of disapproval continue to grow in the country.

“He is frightened that either assassination or poison will be his demise,” said a former aide.

-Polly Pushkin