Big Money Quote Contest Told

(Pinkeyville Math Club Release – September 25, 2015)
Identify the following celebrated quotes by identifying the person least likely to have coined them. Get them all right and we’ll send you a cheesy prize. Get any wrong and you send us $300. Please read each one slowly and carefully and be aware of trick questions. Too bad you didn’t pay attention in high school but who did?
1. “A man who can laugh in the face of death has no business selling headstones.”
2. “Mares eat oats and does eat outs and little lambs eat raw oysters on the half shell with a side of horseradish.”
3. Poems were made with corn and mush, but only God can make a bush.”
4. I can’t tell you much but i can tell you one thing — I’m not a crook.”
5. “A penal implant is nothing more than a stole on the cell block.”
6. His few good ideas came out of a jar of vaseline.”
7. “Daddy gave me a bank for Christmas. He’s just too old to play with it anymore.”

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