Bear Evicted from Roubideau Canyon

Uncompahgre Plateau Shelf Life Times — June 25, 2015

Combined elements of the United States Forest Service and jump troops from the Colorado Division of Wildlife have successfully evicted four to six black bear who have been living illegally in Roubideua Canyon. Along with assorted dependents the bruins were driven from several second-story caves.
The canyon, located west of Olathe, has been a gathering place for the often troublesome bear for centuries.
“The presence of these predators threatens to tip the eco-balance in the region,” said one federal worker. “They don’t have any respect for our gentrified forests and routinely tear up aspen trees marked for harvest and knock trees over onto our manicured trails. They simply had to go.”
The now homeless ursine families are currently living in abandoned federal housing on the outskirts of Pea Green hoping to find longterm dwellings before the hibernation cycle begins again in November. Meals are being provided by the freshmen biology class at Police State College in Gateway.
The displaced animals cited an extended relationship with the country in question saying that bruin ancestors had inhabited the place for more than 1200 years.
Regional tourism touts intend to redevelop the canyon and eventually construct a simulated wildlife park where wild animals will be saved and protected for future generations.
“The place could use a new coat of paint and some carpet and we’re good to go,” said Efram Eater, a former university professor who heads up the park committee. “If we allow nature full control we will have chaos.”
– Gabby Haze