Scribe busted for reading to homeless

(Fort Palm, FL)  Editor Emeritus, Polly Parvenu, has been arrested and charged with reading to the homeless in this swank plastic land on the ocean. She had been accused of breaking a host of rigid ordinances, aimed at diminishing the homeless population in the region.

Parvenu says she is only doing good by reaching out homeless people and invited all to persons of integrity to help those who are less advantaged,

The longtime journalist has pleaded guilty to giving out hot paragraphs, high protein sentences, bowls of adjectives and cans of dangling participles to the needy this fall.

Despite ordinances the prohibit this kind of brotherly love she has pledged to continue the literary social service as soon as the cops let her go.

“We have restrictions in place not because we are mean, insensitive, greedy, xenophobic, racist, unhappy, resentful, frightened, suspicious, angry people but simply because we don’t want to be overrun by vagabonds during the winter months,” said a chamber of comments source. “That is our high season and we want to show a calm, collect, affluent and pseudo-tropical face. The last thing we need is needy people on the beach.”

Parvenu insists that sharing knowledge has never been against the law and that the transient population here will not rise or fall because of a few story hours. She adds that stories give many of these people a respite from the horrors of poverty.

“It’s becoming a crime to be poor in this country,” said Parvenu. “I want to see to it that it’s a crime to embrace ignorance.”

If convicted Parvenu will served 30 days in the library rather than pay a fine.

-Kashmir Horseshoe

“Poor Ash Judd…caught up with the Texans and climbed with them yet another snake fence. He saw woods fair ahead. There were such storms of balls emanating from those woods that Ash could could just about see them in the air like insects.”

– from The Confederates by Thomas Keneally

Filed Under: Lifestyles at Risk

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