Montrose Man Talks to Potatoes

(Spring Creek UPS) Melvin R. Toole hasn’t been the same since the Spanish American War. Having been wounded and separated by his regiment at San Juan Hill, he claims to have survived three months in the jungle on a crop of rogue Irish potatoes.

“I don’t know who planted the spuds but I’d sure like to thank them,” said Toole, who withstood the ordeal as a young man of 17. “He has visited Ireland and Peru (where potatoes were first established as a crop) in search of answers.

“People just stare at me,” he whined.

Today the veteran is satisfied carrying on extended conversations with local spuds.

I can’t really call them dialogues,” said Toole. “but one never knows what’s around the next corner. I just want to find someone to thank and all eyes are on me.”

– Princess Irm Peawit

“News of a runaway sent them (The Patrol) into cheerful activity. They raided the plantations after their quarry, interrogating a host of quivering darkies. Freemen knew what was coming and hid their valuables and moaned when white men smashed their furniture and glass.”

– from The Underground Railroad by Colson Whitehead”

Filed Under: Reflections on Disorder

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